The Sex Isn’t That Good…Should I Leave Or Do I Stay?

 

I’ve asked this question before and never really got a real answer.  Lets say your with someone whom you enjoy being with.  Maybe you’re in love…maybe you’re in “heavy like” as my boi Anthony Taurus would say.  But whatever the case is, you’re really feeling this person and you definitely plan on being with them for an extended period of time. 

So everything is going great.  You enjoy each other’s company.  You have deep meaningful conversations.  You two connect on a lot of levels.  BUT the sex is wack!  For whatever things just ain’t poppin’ off in the bedroom the way you expected they would.  So what do you do?

Do you peace out because the sex is wack?  Here’s my take on it:

Sex isn’t something that have to be naturally good at.  Some people need a lesson…or two.  If I’m not doing something right by all means let a sista know.  I hear a lot of people going hard about sex when it comes to having a relationship with someone.  Is it an absolute dealbreaker?  If the sex ain’t up to par is the relationship not worth having? 

I feel like sex is something you can be taught.  I have no problem being either…the teacher or the student.  Long as I get it right!  I personally wouldn’t end a relationship with someone over sex alone.  That’s something we could work on.  I can only hope it’ll get better with time.  Now if it doesn’t then my ass gotta rethink this whole thing.  But my initial reaction would be to work on it and see what happens.   What about you?

Dear G Spot

I know you might be pissed at me because of my new lover and to be totally honest with you it has caught me by surprise too. Who would have ever guessed that a guy like him…hung like him…would have such problems finding out where and who you are. I really don’t know what to do.  I don’t want to make him feel inadequate but shit…ain’t he?  I’m really wanting to grip him up by the collar and tell him that he ain’t been hitting the spot.  But I really like him.  G’ spot…we go wayyyyy back and I know you’re used to getting special attention but please don’t be mad.  How do I tell him he’s wack?  How do I say to this man “You aint satisfying me?”  I know that it needs to be said because I don’t want him thinking that he’s putting it down when he really aint.  I mean I want the sex between us to be good especially if he’s one I want to keep around.  But what am I to say, how am I supposed to let him know that you exist and feel neglected?  I need answers.

Sincerely,

Hot and Bothered

Ladies how would you tell the man you’re involved with that he aint hitting “the spot?”  What’s the secret to hitting “the spot?”  Fellas would you be offended if your woman had “the talk” with you?  Let’s talk about it!

How Far Will You Go To Please Your Man/Woman?

Are you willing to do anything and everything to please your man/woman?

 

Do virgins still exist?  I’m sure they do but they are few and far in between.  As women we don’t wanna hear things like “I’m not eating the coochie.”  He would never hear the end of it.  The same thing goes for women that say “I’m not slobbing the knob.”  If your man tells you that he wants it day and night would that be cool?  Ok that was an easy one.  What if he comes to you and tells you that he wants to invite someone else to the bedroom?  Hmmm….now you’re thinking.  I mean what if he said you had to blow him off everyday?  Hell, what if she said she needed her toes sucked every now and then?  When does it all become just too much or does it ever?  There are a thousand senarios I can come up with and yet there are only a few reactions.  Either you are gonna stay, leave or compromise.  What’s it gonna be?  Let’s talk!

10 Things Men Should Know About Women

I had to start a list of things I think men needed to know about women.  Men please take heed and women let’s keep the list going….

 

1.  We’re cool playing the “friend” role but when we’ve made it clear that we’re “feeling” you…we don’t wanna hear about your flings, side joints, or jumpoffs. 

2.  We usually know before we’re put in a situation whether or not we are going to give up the goods.  Ladies don’t lie…you know it’s true.

3.  Guys…don’t ask for sexual favors.  It’s a sure way to ruin the mood and a straight shot to the answer you hate…”no!”

4.  We’re not impressed with corny ass pick up lines.

5.  We’re not intimidated by a strong man who can handle his own.

6.  It’s okay to cry.  We appeciate you being all extra tough and stuff but we love when a man isn’t afraid to be vulnerable with us.

7.  We tend to over analyze things.  It’s what we do.

8.  Contrary to what you may think, we want to know about your previous relationships.  We aint trying to hear that “it’s in the past”.  We need to know what we’re dealing with.

9.  If we aint up in the bedroom don’t slap my a$$!  That ish hurts!

10.  You don’t have to make the first move all the time.  A real woman knows what she wants and more importantly knows how to get it!

 

If you have anything you would like to add to this list please leave it in the comments section. 

Age Ain’t Nothin’ But A Number

 

So we’ve all heard the saying “With age comes wisdom,” right?  Well that’s not true for everyone and not true in all instances.  Some things require practice.  It doesn’t matter how many years you’ve walked the earth, how much you’ve accomplished in life, how much money or power you have.  In certain areas practice makes perfect. 

Sex is one of those instances. How in the hell could you be better in bed than a younger guy/girl if you’ve never had sex?  It’s not logical.  I’ll put it to you this way:

You’re 45 yrs old and just learned how to ride a bike 2 months ago.  I’m 27 yrs old and I’ve been riding bikes for 15 yrs.   You’re supposed to be better at riding bikes than me because you’re older than me?  That’s just nonsense.   

When it comes to the physical and situations where you have to be physically active wisdom has nothing to do with the performance.  Sex is something that’s perfected with practice.  I mean you could meet a dude and his performance is lacking terribly.  That doesn’t mean he’ll always be that way or that you have to give him another 10 years before he’s perfected his craft.  That just means that he needs a little lesson…then when you’re done giving him the lesson hell let him practice a lil’ on you…lol.  More sex! 

So hell naw older men don’t win by default.  All men (and women for that matter) have to work at perfecting their craft.  Some men are bad because some women don’t have the balls to tell them that their sex game is wack!

I think this whole concept that older men are better because of their age is ridiculous.  Age doesn’t matter.  I personally prefer men around my age.  I could never get with the “older men” thing.  Just really not my twist.  My experience with guys my age was great!  I’ve never had any major problems.  Then again i’m not scared to ask for what I want.

Let me say this for my homeboi ANTHONY:  Even though I mentioned men a lot in this post it really goes both ways.  This situation applies to men and women.

So what do you think?  Does age really matter?  What’s your experience? 

 

Don’t Take Away My Choice

“Jody, I know you love me.  I also know you fuck other girls.  I don’t like it, but I know you.  So just be real with me.  Will you be honest?”

 
“If you can take it. You’re starting to get on my nerves with this.”

                  
“I’m getting on your nerves?  And you’re the one fucking around.  You get with any of them girls
you sell dresses to?”

                  
“A few.  Feel better now? I love you, girl.  You got my son and you’ll probably be my wife.  You want me to be honest?”

“Yeah, I do.”

                  
“You’re my woman.  Them other hos is tricks.  I make love to you, I want to be with you, but I fuck other females occasionally.  I don’t know why, I just do.  That’s the situation.  You feel better now?  That’s some honesty for you. Deal with it.  I love you enough to be honest.”

                 
“If you loved me, you wouldn’t lie to me all the time.” ~~~ Baby Boy

 

I can’t stand a liar.  That’s some bullshit right there.  You lie to me because you love me.  No nucca, tell me the truth because you love me and care about my feelings.  If we are in a committed relationship there really is no reason to lie.  You shouldn’t be doing anything that you have to lie about.  Lying is a vicious cycle and once you start you can’t stop.  You have to keep covering your lie with another lie.  Eventually you’ll slip up or get tired of the cycle.  I believe that everything in the dark comes to light so what’s the point of lying?  Anyway, how do you guys feel about this?  Men do you really lie to women because you love them?  How about not doing things you have to lie about.  When you lie to me you take away my right to make a choice in the situation. 

Is Fourplay Necessary?

 

I love the MTV show “Man and Wife!”  Fat Man Scoop be on some other ish sometimes but Shanda keeps it real and gives real advice.  Anyway I came across this youtube video about fourplay.  The woman basically says that her man doesn’t do it at all.  That he just wants to shove it in.  Um…yeah.

 

Is fourplay really necessary? 

 

It’s either that or you’re using the KY jelly right?  You can’t just dry fuck somebody.  That’s not cool.  At all.  I’m all for some impromptu sex but if it feels like you’re trying to start a fire down there then please…be a good boy and look out for a sista!  Unless you’re one of the few who’s cooch is always moist…you’re gonna need some type of stimulation.  Whether it be a kiss on the neck, a rub on the breasts or the almight act of cunnilingus…something has to get the juices flowing.  And while every man would hope that the thought alone of his throbbing penis penetrating her is enough to “get her there”…sometimes it’s not.  So people what do you think about this?  Is it necessary?  Can you do without it?  What’s your favorite act of fourplay (excluding cunnilingus and fallatio…majority would probably choose one of the two)?  Come on people…we’re all adults.  Let’s speak on it!

What’s Your Fantasy?

 

We all have one.  Let’s share.  Whether it consists off handcuffs and blindfolds, whips and chains, high heels and g-strings…let us know.  Of course I have one but it’s really not that interesting.  I’m all about love so it’s pretty mushy and probably corny to most of you but it’s mine…you can’t have it.  You have your own.  Tell me.  What’s YOUR fantasy?

 

Oh and one more question:  Will you cheat on your SO to fulfill your fantasy?  Lets say you’re dating Joe the plumber (everybody knows him by now) and your fantasy consists of a tall dark and handsome man who’s hung like a horse.  What do you do?

Does Size Matter?

 

So I’ve decided to kick things off here at YYK with that age old question:

 

 

We’ve all given some thought to this subject and I know many of us have drawn conclusions.  I wanna know!  Please feel free to relive situations you’ve been in.  Your reactions to the size of the package when you finally got up close and personal with it!  Everythang!!  And men I know you’re gonna think this one is for the ladies but you are encouraged to comment as well.  What do you think about size?  Shed some light on the situation for us women if you can.  It’s Friday people!  Let’s have some FUN!!